Skip to main content

The Shrinking Elephant In The Room


First of all, lets throwback to 2010 when I starting blogging as therapy during bad health, a common theme among many old school bloggers. I focussed on beauty because I had always loved it but never really taken the time to learn about it. My original blog was a chance to do that (some of the old posts are still in my archives here if you're looking for a laugh).

As time progressed it became very clear to me that, although I started this blog with Michelle as a beauty blog, the beauty element had taken a back seat to other interests in my life. Michelle for similar reasons took a step back from writing entirely but I shifted my focus. Whether it was food, lifestyle, events or other random things that entered my head, I wrote about it and enjoyed it but I had lost my mojo when it came to pure beauty.
There were several reasons for this. I simply did not have the time or the money to invest in new products. If you include the hours I put into blogging then I was working three jobs, full time in my day job which just about pays the bills and part time as a nail technician which barely covers it's own costs but I love it and for a while it was a form of therapy and escapism to deal with a particularly unhappy time in my life. 
Unfortunately my body could not cope with constant 14/15 hour days and due to a lovely genetic predisposition my physical and mental health gradually deteriorated. 

I mostly dealt with my mental health problems just over a year ago by escaping the cause of them. I cut off my unhealthy acquaintances, I moved to a different town. I completely changed my private life and removed my triggers. It was hard but it was bliss. It was also extra travelling to work and jobs, extra money on bills and rent, and just extra everything. This is when my physical health took a dive and culminated with three emergency hospitalisations totalling nearly 3 weeks at the beginning of 2016. I have been off work sick since then, I am facing the terrifying prospect of abdominal surgery to remove my craptastic innards and I can barely get through the day without a bucket of pills. Thankfully this is improving gradually but you will have noticed me talking about IBD and constantly feeling tired. That's probably not going to change anytime soon but don't worry, I have no plans to go in to detail but you will notice a mention of impending surgeries and a massive change in diet. If you want to know then definitely feel free to ask or google.

I've gone from a comfortable size 20 (if I'm being honest with myself I was pushing a 22) to fitting into my mums size 14/16 jeans. In two months. 
I have become obsessed with my calorie intake. Not to keep it down. To keep it up! I never thought in my life that I would struggle to reach a target of 1200 calories a day. Turns out all I needed was full blown IBD to kick in. Some days I wish I could go back to the years of just pretending I was a little bit lactose intolerant. Or maybe I'd just like to shower without fainting. I guess it's fair to say this has been building up for a while and I shouldn't have been surprised but denial is a great thing and I am excellent at it. 
When I eventually go back to work I know my life will have to change again. I won't be able to keep up the three jobs as I was before, I'll have to re-prioritise. I don't yet know what that will look like. 

But what does this have to do with blogging? Why am I telling you this? Do you even really care? To be honest I don't care if you don't care (I appreciate and am grateful if you do care). This blog is my outlet. This blog is for me. I've never cared about stats or followings, I care about keeping my mind busy and sharing my thoughts. I love connecting with companies and peers but I've never tried to force that or compete with others because this is my personal space. I'm not a career blogger. I don't earn anything. I blog about what I love and at the minute I have a lot of time to do that so the content has changed. The style will always change as I grow into myself. I've gone back to my beauty roots simply because I have the time. There are less parties and more product. Because the best thing about blogging is that you can do 80% of it from your bed with the cat curled up beside you, when you're feeling crappy and you've probably been crying and want to feel better. 
Why do you think it's so popular?



Comments

  1. I firmly believe starting TAF way back when is what kept me going through illness. It gives focus outside of what you're going through and that's priceless xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly! Having that outlet to create something positive and try to infuse that positivity into the rest of your life is key. I don't how I would have coped if I didn't have this outlet. I think people forget the basics of blogging sometimes that this is how so many of us started.

      Delete
  2. I firmly believe starting TAF way back when is what kept me going through illness. It gives focus outside of what you're going through and that's priceless xx

    ReplyDelete
  3. Of course we care. Look after yourself as best you can, and enjpy doing what ever you please with your little slice of the web x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thankyou Laura that really means a lot. Xx

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Matcha Madness: The Body Shop Matcha Tea Face Mask Review

My name is Bex and I am a mask addict! I love masks. Cream, clay, mud, peeling, sheet, cellulose, nourishing... you name it and I love it! I recently spent an evening with the amazing staff from The Body Shop Belfast learning about all their key products and celebrating their cruelty free status and at the end of the night I was very kindly gifted their Japanese Matcha Tea pollution clearing mask - I was delighted!  We all know that the world has gone Matcha crazy but beyond an occasional frappe from a well known coffee house my main experiences have been with Matcha flavour cakes from my local asian supermarket. They are seriously amazing and the lightest sponge I've ever eaten but it doesn't exactly scream "good for you". Thankfully, apart from being seriously tasty Matcha is ridiculously good for you. Traditionally brewed as a simple green tea it is packed full of antioxidants - 10 times the amount in normal green teas as you are consuming the precious groun

Faeriwood Eats: Six By Nico Belfast Review

Nico, surveying his diners Six By Nico . A new concept restaurant for Belfast, and a welcome addition to the cathedral quarter, brought to us from Edinburgh and Glasgow.  6 courses rotating every 6 weeks for only 28.00 and you’re going to want to keep up with them because once they’re gone, they’re gone. With themes such as Vietnamese street food and Parisien cuisine, even a Disney theme being featured in their past menus I am looking forward to seeing what Nico and his team will come up with for Belfast. From talking to them though I found out that their first 3 menus will be inspired by Northern Ireland itself and with some of the best produce in the world and one of the most interesting cultures and histories that will be something to see!  First up is their debut menu, inspired by the humble chip shop, The Chippie menu takes the old standards and modernises them to levels you may be more used to seeing in Michelin level restaurants but with a very un-Michelin price poi

No Halloween Costume Needed

It's become an accepted norm that once December 1st comes around the nations will don their snowflake print leggings and their novelty jumpers but so far the other seasons are lacking in their effort. Yes, Halloween is famous as being the single greatest costume day of the year but I need October to step and represent in the seasonal apparel game.  Thankfully retailers have heard my inner goth cry and have come up with some seriously cute Halloween inspired items. For those who love a slogan tee you have every variation of saying that could possibly be made by rhyming witch with bitch and if you don't say every one of with Emma Roberts' attitude then you need to watch season 3 of American Horror Story immediately!   Dressing with the seasons is clearly big money but it doesn't have to cost the world. Here are my choices of how to get into the Halloween spirit all under £30.  Boohoo Starting with my favourites because I can! I actually bought the f